It is not uncommon for a newcomer to the wonderful world of BDSM to be so nervous that they cancel a session, or just do not turn up for it. There are several reasons for this. Let us explore them.

You have requested something that might be too severe for you.

This is probably the most common reason why a submissive decides not to attend for a session. Perhaps you have requested Hard Sports, or a severe caning from cold, then on the day of the session, you realise that you might not be able to go through it. If that is the case, still come for the session, and in our pre session chat, tell me that you would rather try something less severe. Do not worry about disappointing Me. I love guiding a newcomer into the realms of D/s.

You are nervous about being tied up by a complete stranger

Well of course you are! But let Me assure you that this is your session. During our pre session chat, we will discuss your interests and your limits. If, during the session, you decide that you have changed your mind about something, you can say so and we will try something different. Our session can evolve to suit your own evolving and discovering needs. Together we will explore your submissive psyche.

You realise that what you’ve requested will mark you and that you can’t be marked

It is possible to have a fantastic session, with as much or as little pain as you want, without being marked, or with marks that will fade within a few hours, even with impact play. I am very sensitive to the needs of clients who do not want to be marked.

So, what will you do?

Good communication is key, hence our pre session chat. Feel free to change your mind about a planned activity on the day or even during your session.

If you simply do not turn up without giving Me a reason, I will consider you to be a timewaster, and I will not accept further bookings from you. In fact if you don’t turn up without letting Me know, I will not even answer your call if you ring Me in the future. Many Mistresses will quite rightly take this attitude. We do not appreciate anyone wasting Our time, and we will not allow anyone to do that more than once. It’s a small world, and you can’t afford to burn too many bridges. Read My blog about timewasters.

If you are nervous about the session, turn up for the session and talk to Me. I am exceptionally good with beginners.